We need men in girls ministry.
I know, I know. That sounds a little strange, but hear me out. While an important part of girls ministry is having the unique opportunity for girls to hear from and be led by women, that doesn’t mean it’s necessary to eliminate the presence of men in girls ministry altogether.
As a senior pastor, a student pastor, or the dad of a teenage girl, it might surprise you to hear this but the girls ministry at your church needs you! No, they don’t need you to disciple teenage girls, lead a girls small group, or listen over a cup of coffee as girls share about boy drama, but they need you nonetheless. You see, a man’s role in girls ministry is completely different from a woman’s role in girls ministry, but it’s still just as important!
So, what’s the role of a man in girls ministry?
1. Set the example of a godly man.
Many teenage girls need to see an example of a godly man. For girls who don’t have a father figure or who have a father who isn’t a christian, they need to see how a godly man walks with the Lord and treats women.
Practically, if you’re wondering how a man can set this example within the context of healthy boundaries, the best way is by serving your girls ministry. This might look like serving food at a girls event, carrying luggage for a girls weekend, or helping build a cool photo booth! If you’re not sure how you can serve your girls ministry, reach out to your girls ministry leader.
2. Communicate the value of girls/women in the Church body.
Especially in this day in age, girls need to know that they are valued in the Church. They need to know that they have a place to utilize the gifts and the talents that the Lord has given to them as women.
Practically, the best way to do this is by supporting your girls ministry both with your words and your actions. For pastors, your support may look like simply being present at girls events in a show of support or celebrating how God is working in the lives of teenage girls on a Sunday morning. As a pastor, you have an incredible opportunity to impact the next generation of female leaders – don’t take it for granted!
For dads of teenage girls, an easy way support girls ministry is by encouraging your daughter to be involved! Challenge her to invest in the girls ministry and use her gifts and talents to impact her ministry.
3. Invest in girls’ spiritual growth.
Men can and should have a spiritual impact on girls’ faith journey. When pastors or male church leaders take the time to truly shepherd the girls ministry of their church they are investing in the long term health and growth of the student ministry and church body as a whole. One practical example of this would be teaching a breakout session at your next girls event or conference. Speaking or teaching specifically to teenage girls might be a little out of your comfort zone, but it can make a huge impact on the teenage girls in your church! Encourage them in their discipleship efforts and show them how much you value their spiritual growth!
If you’re the dad of a teenage girl, don’t leave her spiritual growth up to her mom or other female leaders in the church! Invest in her spiritual growth and discipleship by initiating spiritual conversations. Ask her about what she’s reading in her Bible or learning in church. Share with her about what God’s teaching you. As her dad, you have the unique opportunity to speak into her faith journey in a way that only you can!
4. Affirm and encourage the girls ministry leader(s).
Being a woman in ministry can be challenging at times and the support of male leaders in the church can make all of the difference. As a senior pastor, student pastor, or male church leader don’t take your girls ministry leader for granted! Affirm and encourage her in her calling whenever the opportunity arises.
You can do this practically by using words of encouragement and validating her leadership. Valuing her role as a girls ministry leader is an important part of valuing your girls ministry!
If you’re a girls ministry leader and your senior pastor or student pastor doesn’t think they are needed in your girls ministry, let me encourage you to speak up! Find a time to sit down and encourage them by explaining why their presence is needed in your girls ministry. It’s likely they simply aren’t aware of the impact they can have!
With that being said, please don’t neglect setting healthy boundaries for the girls in your ministry as well as the men who serve and support it. Boundaries are incredibly helpful tools within the context of ministry that serve as fences, keeping the “good” stuff in and the “bad” stuff out. However, in order for these “fences” to work properly, they have to be built well! Build strong fences by having clear expectations and guidelines for any interaction between girls and adults. Ask your church leaders for a full list of policies and guidelines.
Girls ministry leaders, don’t ignore the value of a man’s role in girls ministry. Don’t plant your ministry on a girls only island! Encourage your senior pastor and your student pastor to be a part of your ministry. Give them plenty of space to speak into the girls ministry behind the scenes and on the frontlines. By doing this you are modeling a healthy view of Church leadership for your girls!
Taylor Cage is a Nashville native, currently living in Oklahoma City with her husband, Baron, who serves as a student pastor at Trinity Baptist Church. After college, she spent three years as a Girls Minister and she’s passionate about building gospel-centered community among women of all ages. Taylor is the Social Media Coordinator for Well-Watered Women and a regular contributor for the Lifeway Girls blog. Most days you can find her writing about God’s Word with a cup of coffee in hand or chasing around her Goldendoodle, Posie. Connect with Taylor: Instagram